Itchy Mouth

I'm probably the worst snacker of all time

..or the best?

I remember being at a friends place snacking on cookies and I dramatically say

"TAKE THESE AWAY FROM MEEE! IT WILL NEVER END!"

to which she responds,

 "yes, she's serious, remember Chinese New Year?"

Back up a couple of months to CNY,

we were at a friends place and I was watching a game of MahJong, 

my arm taking it's place inside the kuih kapit (chinese wafer...thing) container.

I wasn't paying attention to anything but the game, 

Next thing I know, I've reached the bottom of the container and the layers of kuih kapit have disappeared. I must have eaten at least 40.

And this was after I've eaten half a dozen tiny mandarins 

and munched down those fried crispy seaweed chips.

Now to last week,

 I was stressfully chomping on hot Cheetos (the best thing ever invented)

I got the giant-est packet because the small packets are child's play.

So I reach in to get my first Cheeto and the bag is empty. 

This empty bag of Cheetos is obviously a conspiracy.

Except it wasn't my first Cheeto and my arm is covered in red Cheeto dust, 

so are the corners of my mouth.

How did this even happen?

I'm so confused that I open a new giant-est bag of Cheetos to calm my nerves.



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